God Save the Queen

“Hey, uh, I'm pregnant.”

“Yeah, well what do you want to do?”

“I don't want to have it; we're too young…”

“People say the younger the mother, the better the chances…”

“You want me to have this kid? Is that what you are saying? My mom died during childbirth, Jer.. you remember that right?

“We're gonna have to take care of it.”

“Yeah, I know…”

“Do you have any money, Jer, I can't clean houses any more; I'm getting too sick, the chemicals are making me too sick.”

“I'll work on it… you know I will.”

“I'm tired, Jer, I'm going to sleep…I'll talk to you tomorrow

image of a naked bloated middle aged woman floating in a northern sea, being eaten by the fish….

Here I was a few months out of college, bartending part time; drinking full time…broke all the time and my wonderful, sweet Claire was pregnant…. Coming up with the 350 was within the realms of possibility….. it was just gonna take a couple weeks….

My attorney buddy Zeke would be showing up soon… he'd been working on cases again since his release from the mental hospital (addiction to Benzedrine!)

I stared out the window… it's pretty slow in the daytime around here.

Quick Fade: Sorry, Jer, I'm flat broke…. I don't have a spare dime….

More drinking. An old guy, Bob, comes in and has one. Leaves.

Hey, Jer, c'mere; I got an idea…. I know you're in dire straits or I'd never bring it up…. I got this great uncle who owned a farm up in Hamburg ; I used to spend summers with him and my aunt… he was a real nice guy when my aunt was alive but he changed after she died…. I don't really know what was what exactly but I do know that he drank a lot…. Speaking of… (he motions to me for another; I get him another)…. Anyways, he blew his head off with a shotgun…

Wow… I motioned to him with the “what does that mean to me” body language.

What does that mean to us? He was buried with a really, really nice ring…. A handcrafted 24k gold freemasons ring. You get to that ring and your money problems are solved… I can move it to a guy in Reading… Nazi guy….. guns, coins, jewelry…. You get the ring and I can move it… why don't you go get it?

My heart's giving me problems, Jerry. I wouldn't last 45 minutes up there digging. Else I might do it; should've done it years ago.

Can you get me the equipment?

Pick and a shovel, flashlight… that we can do. You'll be riding your bicycle to the burial plot as it is rather remote. Sort of up there on the middle of Hawk Mountain .

A third. Fine. But no matter what, I need 450 bucks. You got that? Here, have another… on the house.

You're a nice guy and all Zeke but I got to ask, what's in it for you?

I get a third.

A third. Fine. But no matter what, I need 450 bucks. You got that? Here, have another… on the house.

INT.KutztownApartment.Night

Glumly lit, yellowish light… small room…

Yeah, hey, hi…. I think it'll work out. Make the appointment, yeah wherever you want. No, it's nothing illegal, I'm going to help a guy out with a driveway… a couple days, max.

I love you too. Yeah, I'll talk to you tomorrow. Bye.

Hangs up the cell phone and does a line.

INT.Shortys.Night

Drinking at Shortys. Wandering eyes but he remains loyal. Drinks himself into oblivion.

July 4 posters.

EXT.Kurtzville's Streets.Middle of Night

Wanders home thru the foggy, misty Kurtzville Streets.

INT.Apartment.Night

Listens to message machine…no new messages….

Collapses into bed….

Whew… what the fuck have I got myself into now?

Quick Cut:

Peter banging on the door….

Hey, Fuckhead, are you coming to work today?!

Bam…bam… bam

Jerry wakes up and leans out the window.

I'll be over there in a half hour….

Faster. If you're not up there in 20 minutes, I'm firing you.

I'll be up there as soon as I can.

Cut:

INT.Coffee Shop.Day

Slow day.

Zeke finally walks in.

You hear from any of the schools that got you on the waiting lists.

I'm not getting into any law schools. Not this year at least.

You'll get in… just keep banging your head against the wall… they like that… the legal profession admires people who are willing to continually bang their heads against walls.

About what we talked about yesterday… I'm game... I'll give it a shot, why not… you're pretty sure he was buried with the ring, right?

I'm reasonably sure… it was a closed casket funeral; by the time anyone found him, he'd been hanging in that oak tree for two and a half days…. In the middle of June…. Crows were picking at his eyes and all. My mom went up there after she didn't hear from him and couldn't reach him by phone. He was a mean old bastard, he wanted his family to see him hanging like that and he wanted to horrify them… I'm pretty sure the ring is in the casket but we won't know until someone goes up there and digs. I will warn you—friend to friend—there were stories about the undertaker who handled the funeral…

Stories?

Rumours… robbery and necrophilia mostly… he was part of a strange family and believe me when you are being called strange in Berks County , that's saying something… nothing ever came of the rumours and the business itself died with old Harry Kutz as he was childless…. Never married… make of that what you will…. No one ever found anything suspicious when they went thru ol Harry's belongings after he died. It's probably there.

I want to dig him up tomorrow. It's the Fourth of July and everyone will be busy having fun and staring at the sky. Can you dig me up the tools?

I looked for them and couldn't find ‘em…

A shovel and a pick is going to run me 30 bucks that I really don't have. I know where I can borrow a couple. The farm behind Clarissa's house has a barn full of that sort of stuff. I'll poke around tonight. I'm sure there's something useful back there.

Cut:

EXT.OLD FARM.NIGHT

It's late; Jeremiah sneaks around; goes into the barn… pokes around a little… dogs bark, not real close, not real far. He exits the barn with some tools… he walks across the field and back toward town….

Alone.

INT.AirportDiner.Night

Jeremiah's drinking coffee.

At 3 a.m. he looks over into the booth. There's a one eyed midget drinking a milkshake laughing at him.

EXT.Hiway61.Midafternoon

Jeremiah rides with some traffic; then gets off onto roads that are more remote and more remote. And then the climb begins. Some problems with the tools. More climbs. Witchcraft Road. Remoteness. Oneness. Dusk happens. Jeremiah watches downward at the Fourth of July celebrations beginning to build in intensity.

He continues onward… deeper into the woods…. He needs to use the hand drawn napkin map form this point onward. More transition. By the time he reaches the graveyard, he is using the light on his bicycle. He parks it and walks back another hundred yards or so… keeping the flashlight low… he spots the graveyard. Five stones. Older, traditional.

He starts digging; soon the fireworks below him begin.

The dig. The fireworks. The fireworks end. The dig continues. It's work. Some point into the night, Jeremiah strikes the top of the coffin. He smashes into it with the pick…. Starts digging around, feeling around. PANIC. BONES. PUTRESCENCE.

Where's the fucking ring!?

More smashing into the casket. More bones. More putrescence. More hand digging around the coffin.

A break. Watches some amateur fireworks going off. Some Gatorade. Regroup. Looking around again.

The fuckin undertaker… took the ring…. Another amateur firework.

More digging. More smashing. More getting to know the corpse.

When will I be here in the ground…will Clarissa be lying next to me? Will someone dig me up in search of a small treasure? A windfall.

Another firework. A better search. Flashlight. Examination.

BINGO. Is Harry going to jump? The Masonic ring. Jeremiah checks it out. A firecracker in the distance.

Jeremiah puts the ring in the bike bag. Looks at his watch. 2:30 a.m. .

He replaces as much of the coffin parts as he can. Then he starts replacing the dirt. No big deal. Secures the tools. Double checks to ensure the ring was still there. Says a final visual goodbye to Uncle Henry. Starts walking back to the bicycle… the moonlight helps. Gets on the bike and starts pedaling down the road. Ghosts? Nighttime ride back to Kurtzville, ghosts; a closer relationship with the dead. Pulls the bicycle by the barn and quickly replaces the borrowed tools.

INT.COFFEE SHOP.EARLY MORNING

ZEKE and JEREMIAH are sitting in the coffee shop and they exchange the ring….

Zeke

I'll be back in two hours with your share…

Jeremiah

Thanks Zeke, it's a big help….

Zeke

You did all the work, Jer… I'll buy the drinks tonight… you earned it…. How'd he look, pretty bad?

Jeremiah

Yeah, he looked pretty bad; his skin wasn't in such great condition either…. I think it was a one time thing, Zeke…. I think this job is going to continue giving me the creeps for some years to come, Pal.

Zeke

I have no idea where to dig up any more jewelry anyway.

INT. BASIN STREET ROOM. AFTERNOON

Yeah… everything's cool… I should have the money by tomorrow night…. I'll give you a call tomorrow… yeah…yeah… no problem… I love you…. Bye.